looking ahead: 2018 vs 2019

earlier this month i posted some thoughts on resolutions (nay) and thoughtfulness (yay) moving into the next year. i mentioned writing a looking ahead spread, an intentions spread.

i love my notebooks, it’s no secret. i return to these spreads. i use these spreads, but i do not stick to them. i let them develop and shift and move and evolve. i love this, because it preserves the mindset i began with, yet still offers a guide for when i drift.

a reader asked me to share the way i journal, so without further ado, here is a quick comparison of my looking ahead spreads, 2018 and 2019.

if you’re curious, i explored within these ideas. for example, my human experience exploration naturally boiled down to the feminine experience, via my reading choices. as another example, i didn’t explore church as justice, but that’s something i want to carry into 2019, so it’s okay. on the creative projects front, i did not go after most of what i listed, but i did pursue many, surprising others. and that is okay, and exciting to me. this is also why returning to these spreads and writing a review a year later is so fascinating.
yee haw, 2019 let’s go. the right side is not quite finished yet, but it exists.

so there you have it, a lil peek into my brain.

this year is going to challenge me. a little earlier, i thought “step” would be my word for the year, as 2019 will be essentially demanding a run out of me: hopefully a full time job *knocks on wood* and some creative development.

but as i wrote the words on the left side, “honor + open” appeared. i had a job interview recently 😉 and one of the questions was “what’s your customer service philosophy and how does it apply to youth?” and lemme tell you, this sparked thoughts:

i’ve been thinking about whiteness and all the other privileges i have, and what those mean for me, as well as being female and the other disadvantages and experiences i have had, allowing me to glimpse other worlds and increase my empathy. i don’t want to shirk both the responsibility of privilege and the power of empathy.

two quotes come to mind when i ponder this responsibility and my philosophy for service, and i know they influenced this phrase, “honor + open.” i shall leave you with them today:

… equipping children to reclaim their power as invested, active contributors to society… transform communities by recognizing, celebrating, and nurturing the diversity, creative nature, and voice within every person.

via shane claiborne

we cannot live in a world that is not our own, in a world interpreted for us by others. an interpreted world is not home. part of the terror is to take back our own listening, to see our own light.

hilde von bingen

perhaps “space” is the word over arching “honor + open”: 
how can i make space within my self to grow?
how can i make space for my self / how can i take up space?
how can i give space to others who are not given enough?



ps, this was my first stab on the new wordpress editor, and it is a sneaky lil beast. not sure how to make it submit to me yet.

pps, i don’t exactly know how i have readers and requests already, as i haven’t exactly broadcasted this space. honestly, i haven’t told much of anyone, just bc i feel slightly selfish making a space for myself. how silly is that???? especially considering the post i just wrote???? it’s totally silly. 

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